I don't generally believe in bribing children. In fact I'm pretty against it. I believe children need to learn to do things because it's the right thing to do, and not because you get a reward. The reward system is called a token economy and here is a perfect example.

Take your typical "entitlement generation" high school grad. She thinks she should get a new car for graduating high school. Her parents agree. "Congratulations, Daughter!"She thinks, "Awesome".

Take your other typical high school grad, who was raised in an authoritative home (authoritative parenting has been proven to be the most effective type of parenting. Not to be confused with authoritarian). She was not raised in a token economy but thinks she should ask for a car for graduation anyway. Her parents disagree. "If you can't graduate high school, you're a dummy". She thinks, "They're right. But it still sucks".

Can you guess which example was mine? Okay, my parents didn't say that if I couldn't graduate I was a dummy, but they did say something along those lines. My high school graduation present was dinner at Macaroni Grill. And I'm still grateful for it, because I love that place. And I'm grateful that they didn't get me a car. I was a really bad driver back then.

So- back to bribing. I haven't bribed Devan with anything yet. Not when I stopped nursing, not when I took her bottles away, not when I wanted her to sleep in her own bed, etc. And she knows that she has responsibilities around the house, too. She will put her laundry away, throw away her diapers and put her toys away all without being rewarded. She's seemed to respond well to my parenting decisions, except when it comes to one thing: Potty training.

I have been potty training her for well over a month and I still cannot leave the house without a diaper on her. I had tried EVERYTHING. Keeping the toilet in the family room, putting a toilet seat on the big toilet, letting her put stickers on a chart, and giving her lots of salty foods and juice so she'd go more. Nothing seemed to click for her. The other night I was watching Jon and Kate Plus 8 and they were potty training. Kate gave her kids one M&M each time they used their toilets. I suddenly knew what I had to do.

I took Devan to the store with me today and bought a big bag of M&M's. We came home and I repeatedly asked her if she had to go pee. She always says no. She always says no until she pees in her underwear. So today after asking her for about 30 minutes, I decided to try a little bribe. "If you go pee pee, you can have one M&M". She immediately RAN to the toilet and peed. It was pretty amazing, really. She was so happy to pick out one M&M she said she had to pee again, but couldn't. I put the candy in a jar and on a shelf where she can see them and I have a feeling potty training is going to be a bit easier for both of us. And as long as I make sure that one M&M doesn't turn into a car for high school graduation, we'll be okay.